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WMP
Joined: 30 May 2000
Posts: 671
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 Posted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 6:09 pm Post subject: |
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| madspaniard wrote: | | tetiaroaxx wrote: | Not to seem too hard on you, but how was a mast extension gonna grab it? Sorry, that's something the late, great isobars would say (this has to be the first one he has ever missed). Is it at The Hatch? Is it a watch? Is it an Omega? Is it on the left side of the poop pillar or on the right? Do you know how deep you pushed it in with the mast extension? What color is the band?
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We also need to know poo color, consistency, density, secondary porosity, whether it has corn in it, and liquid limit to assess the resistance of the poo to be stretched out. |
Also... I'd like to hear more details about the poo juice. This is all very important information to this operation. |
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windoggi
Joined: 22 Feb 2002
Posts: 2743
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| Posted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 6:30 pm Post subject: |
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Where's isobars when you really need him? He knows EVERYTHING!
_________________
/w\ |
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wmike
Joined: 20 Jan 2001
Posts: 207
Location: Maui
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| Posted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 8:25 pm Post subject: |
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Not only does iSOBARS know everything, he has done everything better than we could ever do anything. Bet he has lost more stuff in poo and recovered more stuff out of the poo than any of us. 
/m\ |
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petroburton
Joined: 20 May 2008
Posts: 10
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| Posted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 9:09 pm Post subject: |
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Maybe the isobars guy has seen this in 'Nam and knows how to recon:
The Antichrist:
A cone of crap that has grown well beyond the seat and is staring sideways right at you! |
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tetiaroaxx
Joined: 06 Oct 2015
Posts: 225
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| Posted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 10:14 pm Post subject: |
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Last edited by tetiaroaxx on Thu Apr 17, 2014 6:18 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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windoggi
Joined: 22 Feb 2002
Posts: 2743
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| Posted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 12:15 am Post subject: |
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| tetiaroaxx wrote: | Right, this is the best operation we have come up with so far. We will be returning tonight after dark, once we have downed some keystones, to commence the siphoning.
What we don't know, and need much professional assistance with, follows:
1) Although we have to use standard masts, due to the copious nature of the poo juice, we are not sure if they will take the load structurally. We couldn't decide on the 'Ride 40' for the top member, due to it's stronger, albeit less rigid, lower carbon content, or if this choice will only haunt us by causing too much flex and upsetting our building code recommended 10 degree slope to keep any TP sloshing across. We chose, in the end, the 'Free 80' and decided to take our chances with a fracturing, and keep well clear of the tower.
2) The duck tape we used was 'Duck Brand', and we are not sure if the company has undergone changes due to cutbacks caused by reduced government tax incentives during the Clinton years, or if the product is still as sound as when used for these operations during the Vietnam War. Any failure at the joints will cause much hardship.
3) If we leak poo juice on the site, we cannot tell if the proposed condo project will require environmental damage assessment, and possibly a geotec survey if the juice penetrates into the underlying bedrock. If this causes a delay in construction, we are not sure if we will be held liable.
4) The sucking required to get the column of poo juice past 4m has been calculated at 20psi, but we honestly do not know what the hell we have calculated here, what we are even talking about, or who is even going to do the sucking and what health risks that may cause.
As you can see, we are very new to this, and clearly don't know our asses from a hole in the ground, nor are we qualified to even contemplate such a venture. We our acting foolishly, dangerously, and need a good slapping upside. |
You are the winner of the Write Like Isobars Award...named after a man who, long ago, learned how to Stand Up For A Principle, and To Sit Down On His Own Stool.
_________________
/w\ |
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fearnobeer
Joined: 30 Nov 2007
Posts: 78
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| Posted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 9:47 am Post subject: |
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Somebody will have to put on a hazmat suit and go in after it.  |
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tetiaroaxx
Joined: 06 Oct 2015
Posts: 225
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| Posted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 6:50 pm Post subject: Debriefing |
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Last edited by tetiaroaxx on Thu Apr 17, 2014 6:17 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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WMP
Joined: 30 May 2000
Posts: 671
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| Posted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 7:32 pm Post subject: |
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Will this environmental disaster delay or cancel the Broughton Landing Resort project?
Last edited by WMP on Wed Jun 18, 2008 12:01 am; edited 1 time in total |
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madspaniard
Joined: 23 May 2005
Posts: 380
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| Posted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 8:24 pm Post subject: |
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FEMA's director is about to resign due to this poo crisis. Numerous reports warned the shit was gonna hit the watch, excuse me, the fan. Brad Shitt volunteered to shovel out the poo in an effort to save the watch from poo juice corrosion. Population in the area is prairie dogging due to lack of porta potties.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=PRAIRIE+DOGGING |
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