Behaving Badly

[WindsurfUtah]

I think sometimes we let one event start a sequence of events that occur because we react instead of act. For all we know the said offender could have bad eye sight and thought he was further away then reality. He could have thought he recognized you and was trying to get closer to see if you were actually that person. Or he could really have been an jerk that wants to ruin your day.

I play indoor soccer and see this happen to teammates all the time. They get fouled hard and the ref doesn't give them the proper call. Within one second their, and sometimes my, attitude goes from lets have fun to I am going to slam that guy against the wall so hard he won't ever dare touch me again. Which we all know leads to an escalation of aggression. And as your mom says, "it's all fun and games until someone gets hurt." Great competitors put blinders on and don't let the small stuff effect their performance.

Last year a team mate let his aggression get out of hand and decided to take out the oppossing goalie. We heard a loud snap upon the collision followed by my teammate crying that he broke his leg. He ended up in the hospital intensive care unit for almost a week due to complications. The lesson I picked up from this is that one missed foul isn't worth a broken leg. One offense doesn't equal the value of my happiness, so I try not to trade it.

Often times once we get into that "justice is required" thinking we look for the slightest offense to prove our case of injustice.

It sounds like this offender really is a jerk. I hope that he was just a jerk that day and he has thought introspectively about his behavior as well.

Sometimes I am so amped up getting to the water, it usually takes a good session to take the edge off.

By the way last year I came really close to getting creamed by someone jibing into me. Turned out he had bad vision. Now I stay upwind of him.

[jfjfjfjf]

Yeah, it's always someone else's fault. Come on, already, this guy fell in the path of another sailor who also needed to jibe as they reached the levy. He would have known what to expect if he bothered to look behind him before practicing another expected failed jibe. The guy behind him had to be right behind him but avoided the dufuss who fell right in front of him by jibing behind him not in front of him. He didn't just appear out of nowhere. From the sanctimonious vindictivess of what he wrote here and the actions he describes I wouldn’t be surprised if this was in front of the launch area which isn't supposed to be used as a practice area. To make matters worse the guy in the water yells at the guy who avoided his "maneuver" as if it's his fault. Later he keeps his eye on him but purposely gets into another encounter with his supposed transgressor after stalking him, trying to interfer with his sailing and runs right into him after making him fall instead of avoiding him and blames him because "this is what happens when you come too close".

I don't sail Rio anymore because of people like you and the kiters but I hope I don't come across you sailing in the area I do, driving on the roads, on the sidewalk or hear anything else from you. It seems you are to blame not the other guy, You caused the problem, you started it by yelling at him, you continued to escalate the problem you created. You could have really hurt the guy by causing him to fall and running into him instead of just running over his sail and mast. “No damage done” – sure!.

[madspaniard]

this is a pattern that I see too often now in this forum, people (jfjfjfjf in this case) making deep judgements on situations they didn't witness. Did you see the duck jiber falling in the path of another sailor? Don't say so in such an affirmative way if you were not there.

jfjfjfjf, there are always two sides of a story, don't make a third one here. If you read the original post from johnl: "there were about 4 of us in the water, so it was not crowded at all .....He was 8 - 10 feet away when he finished his turn. I don't know if he was 2 feet away when he buzzed me"

There is no reason to be that close to or behind another sailor before and during your jibe when there are only 4 sailors in the water.

[coachg]

[swchandler]

I think jfjfjfjf is forgetting is that cavalier sailor using johnl as a jibe marker was over the top with the expletive and the flip-off. Following someone too close on an uncrowded day and then reflecting such a bad attitude is totally unwarranted. A simple apology, like "hey sorry about that", would have been appropriate and quite adequate, and I'm quite sure the situation would have been suitably diffused. Really, a good attitude on the water makes total sense.

[jp5]

[jfjfjfjf]

Like I said: it's always someone else's fault and the guy purposely dropped out of the sky just so he could jibe 8 feet away from me. How dare he! He must be taught a lesson. I'm going to try and kill him by running over him!

My description was not a third side. It was what the other sailor must have encountered from the information johnl provided. To me it made johnl appear to be the cause of the problem right from the start.

I'll shut up now as this is a loosing battle. The current attitude these days seems it's always someone else's fault and we'll argue or fight to the death to prove it. Siding with a supposed victim is compassionate but in this case I think you're wrong as the victim is the aggressor and has never mentioned that he considered what he could have done to cause it. Sorry to disagree with you madspaniard and the rest of you but in this case I have to call a spade a spade. Coachg: when you make a comment like that it makes you sound like the guy in the water who would swear at someone when it's their own fault.

[jp5]

An interesting perspective jf. Of course there are always 2 sides to every story. It is indeed better if we let things slide and all try to get along. That which does not kill you, makes you stronger, don't sweat the small stuff, it's all small stuff. Or something like that.

[flyskiwindsurf]

[madspaniard]