Do My Online Proctored exam

[isobars]

I love taking tests, and am good at Jeopardy. I'd be glad to take your exam for you. What topic is it on? How do we go about it? Would I incur any legal risks if caught? How stringent are the pass/fail criteria ... if outside my fields of expertise, would a long lifetime of broad knowledge suffice?

Or is this just clickbait that's going to take me to some nefarious website? Given that risk, let's continue the discussion right here out in the open.

[isobars]

One of the countless proctor exam cheat factories promises, "Do My Online Proctored Exam Now is a secure and confidential service. We are bound by our oath to never reveal your identity to anyone".

• I hope they don't do English grammar tests.

• Their "oath" means exactly what, given that their very reason for existence is dishonesty?

Oh, crap ... another forum (rightfully) censored him. Too bad; I really wanted to take his exam for him.

[SAS]

You would fail the test, unless it is a test on something basic like the alphabet,

Multiple studies show that Faux News viewers like you are the least informed people. They know the least about what is going on in the world and the least about science. They still belive the election was stolen. They believe the assault on our Capitol was grannies on a tour. They belive that Iraq had WMD.

[isobars]

..

[isobars]

I try to write for folks who possess a full deck of cards. Sometimes I miss. Because you're such a nice guy, I'll lower the bar.

Do I really HAVE to explain in detail, just for you, that hands down my foremost, most dedicated, most lofty purpose in taking some cheater's test would to not merely flunk the test, but to embarrass him so badly that no school, bar, teacher, or peer could ever take him seriously again?

Laughing 'til my sides split and I had to change my pants three times would be a bonus.

The real challenge ... the greatest bonus ... would be making it look to the proxy like my answers were serious and to the school or whatever that El Cheato was honestly that dumb, not just openly jerking their chains. I doubt I could pull it off, though, because I'd be laughing too hard at all the possibilities of open-ended questions. No multiple choice tests allowed, of course; too easy to deliberately flunk and little room for imagination. The test would have to rely on writing in any of several languages from English to mathematics to make it interesting.

My writing has been winning awards, jobs, promotions, accolades, cash, several years of heartbeat, and/or simple appreciation for myself and others for 71 years now, in a broad variety of low- (dirt bike electronics and dynamics) and high-tech (space systems analysis), humorous, imaginative, persuasive, expository, legal, career-advancing, (others') career-ending, downright fun, recreational, business, medical, financial, motivational, and many more applications. My legal documentation whupped a district prosecutor and a state trooper ... again ... just yesterday. Deliberately, imaginatively, and humorously revealing a faker's true colors would be worth hours of time, and would beat arguing with children ALL to hell. I hoped it would be an all-day test, and I'd have paid HIM to take it for him if the topic and format justified it. Hell, the worst outcome would be flunking it unintentionally, and even that would accomplish Job 1.

Thanks, Popeye. For once it was worth peeping.

[SAS]

Sad
He really is losing it

A mind is a terrible thing to waste